Do I Need a Mentor to Breed Cats? What New Breeders Really Need Instead

Starting out as a new cat breeder can feel overwhelming. Everywhere you look, people say you need to find a mentor before you can even begin. But how do you know who to trust? And do you really need one at all?

I want to share my personal take on how to choose the right guidance, what a mentor (or coach) really looks like in cat breeding, and how to avoid the traps that can make your first years in the cat fancy so stressful.

Are You Looking for a Mentor as a New Cat Breeder?

If you’re new to cat breeding, chances are someone has already told you this, “You need a mentor.”  And suddenly you panic.

You might be thinking

• Who do I ask?
• How do I even approach someone?
• What if I annoy them?
• What if I choose the wrong person and do everything wrong anyway?

This is one of the biggest stress points I see in new cat breeders. It creates fear before you’ve even had the chance to enjoy starting your breeding journey.

So let’s talk honestly about it.

Why New Cat Breeders Are Told They Need a Mentor

The idea behind having a mentor isn’t bad.  You have probably been told by other cat breeders or older people in the cat fancy that having one is super important.

• In theory, a mentor should
• Help you avoid mistakes
• Share experience
• Guide you through tricky situations
• Support you while you’re learning

That all sounds amazing.  The problem is how this advice plays out in the real world.

The Reality of Finding a Cat Breeding Mentor

It's not as easy as it sounds.  For many new cat breeders, trying to find a mentor looks like this:

• You’re told to ask a local breeder
• You feel awkward reaching out
• You worry about being judged
• You don’t want to feel like a burden
• You’re scared of doing the wrong thing
• You are scared to choose the wrong person

And even when someone does step into a mentor role, it doesn’t always go well.

When a Mentor Becomes Controlling

This is something I’ve seen repeatedly over more than twenty years of breeding cats and helping breeders all over the world.  

Sometimes a so called mentor

•  Insists their way is the only right way
• Pushes their personal preferences onto you
• Tries to control your decisions
• Gets passive aggressive or angry if you start to grow as a breeder and make your own decisions
• Makes you feel small or inexperienced
• Prioritises their own cat breeding agenda over your goals

When you’re brand new, it’s very hard to tell the difference between guidance and control.  And that can leave you feeling more confused and anxious than when you started.  

Watch Out for “Free Cats and Favours”

One of the biggest traps I see new cat breeders fall into is accepting a “free” cat or a favour from someone they look up to.

It sounds generous. It feels exciting. But often there are strings attached that keep you tied to that person’s rules and decisions for years.

I recently made a video about this called New Cat Breeders: Beware of 'FREE' Cats and Favours! where I share real stories and the red flags to look for. If you haven’t seen it yet, I strongly suggest you give it a watch before making any big decisions.

You Don’t Actually Need a Traditional Mentor

This might surprise you, but here’s the truth. You don’t need one single person watching over every decision you make.

What you really need is

• Access to experience
• Safe places to ask questions
•  Different perspectives
• Support without judgement
• The freedom to decide what works for you

That’s very different to having one mentor who holds all the power.

A Better Option for New Cat Breeders

Instead of searching for a mentor and hoping it works out, there’s a much safer and more supportive option. That’s joining a space built specifically for new cat breeders.

Inside the New Cat Breeders Club, you get

• Me, with over twenty years of breeding experience
• New breeders just like you from all over the world
• People breeding many different cat breeds
• Advice without judgement, agendas or pressure
• Support that’s based on real experience, not control

No one tells you what you must do.  You get information, support, and perspective. Then you choose what’s right for you.

Why Peer Support Matters So Much

One of the most powerful things about the Club is that you’re surrounded by people at the same stage as you.

Our newbies

• Remember exactly how it feels to be new
• Ask the questions you’re afraid to ask
• Share what worked and what didn’t
• Want to help, not control

They have your best interests at heart because they’re walking the same path.  That creates a very different energy to a traditional mentor relationship.

What This Really Comes Down To

Being told you need a mentor can make starting out feel much harder than it needs to be.

Instead of feeling supported, you end up second guessing yourself before you’ve even begun. You worry about who to ask, how to ask, and whether you’re going to upset someone or get it wrong.

That pressure doesn’t help you become a better breeder. It just makes everything feel heavier.

And it’s not because you’re doing anything wrong. It’s because the traditional idea of “find a mentor” doesn’t actually suit most new cat breeders.

What Support Should Look Like When You’re New

At the beginning, you don’t need someone overseeing every decision you make.

You need

• A place where questions are welcome
• People who remember what it’s like to be new
• Advice that’s shared, not enforced
• Experience you can learn from without feeling small

Most importantly, you need support that lets you grow into your own breeder, not someone else’s version of one.

Why the New Cat Breeders Club Exists

This is exactly why I created the New Cat Breeders Club.

It’s a space for new breeders who want help without pressure and guidance without control.

Inside the Club, you get

• Access to my 20 plus years of breeding experience
• New breeders from all over the world
• People breeding different breeds, in different situations
• Honest conversations without judgement

You hear different perspectives. You ask questions openly. You learn by seeing how others handle the same situations you’re facing.

No one tells you what you must do. You’re trusted to make your own decisions.

A Different Way to Get the Support You’ve Been Looking For

If you’ve been worried that you can’t move forward without finding the right mentor, here’s the simple truth.

You don’t need to keep searching or putting yourself in uncomfortable situations.

You can choose support that’s already there, built for people exactly where you are right now.

The New Cat Breeders Club gives you guidance, experience, and reassurance without strings attached.

You’re supported. You’re respected. And you’re never expected to do things someone else’s way.

Where This Leaves You

You don’t need to rush out and find a mentor or put yourself in uncomfortable situations just because someone told you that’s the rule.

What matters is having support that helps you think clearly, learn steadily, and make decisions that feel right for you and your cats.

There are many ways to get that support. What matters is choosing one that feels safe, practical, and grounded in real experience.

If reading this has eased some of the pressure you’ve been carrying around the idea of needing a mentor, then you’re already moving in the right direction.

The next step is simply choosing how you want to be supported as you continue.  Join Today. 

And really, I don't even consider myself a mentor.  That's why I am the Cat Breeder Coach!!  Find out more in this podcast episode  The Truth About Why I Don’t Consider Myself a Cat Breeding Mentor (it’s a podcast episode that has helped a lot of new breeders feel a huge weight lifted off their shoulders).